Dr. Brian Mackey: What your kids really needs in divorce
We have such a juicy new episode for you, Friends. It's about how children can THRIVE during and after their parents divorce. It's the realest, bestest, and most counter-cultural thing we see at Two Families Law and we've been dying to share it with you all.
In my day job as a collaborative divorce lawyer, one of our most magical tools in our non-violent toolbox is a neutral, skillful, well-trained child psychologist. And Dr. Brian Mackey is the very best.
Brian is a divorced dad, a new-ish step-dad, the owner of a booming psych practice in NC (3-C Family Services), and an expert in representing children's interests in collaborative divorce. He meets with the children of our divorcing families, gathers their needs and interests, analyzes their coping skills and patterns, and then lovingly shares this insight with the parents and lawyers -- all at the same round table. The result is a deeper and clearer understanding for everyone about how the individual kids in any family are doing with the change, and how all the grown-ups can best support them. It's the fucking best.
And as if he wasn't already supporting healthy divorce enough through collaborative work, he agreed (enthusiastically even!) to sit at the Divorced People table with me and share his own personal story as well as the fruit of his work. It was spectacular.
Brian was, bravely, our first male-identifying guest. Purposefully, I have spotlighted female and queer stories because of their unique role in the world of marriage and divorce. And it's time to add in new perspectives too. It was refreshing and fascinating to hear what some of the common patterns, tropes, gender roles, and conflicts sounded like to him and I'm so grateful for his candor and vulnerability.
Loves, if I could leave the world with one message about divorce it would be this: it doesn't have to be a net loss for anyone-- parents, children, society. It is a net win for humans ALL THE TIME.
Please enjoy hearing from Dr. Brian Mackey what it looks like to divorce in a way that heals everyone, including the babies.
